Bad Romance: 10 Phrases Never to Say to Your Customers

Your brand’s image isn’t defined by your logo. Your message isn’t controlled by your latest carefully crafted ad campaign. Your reputation isn’t wrapped up in your website.

In today’s age of social media, each and every one of your customers holds a megaphone, and he who holds the megaphone controls the message.

As a result, every single interaction your customers have with your brand shapes not only the way they perceive your company and its values but how they share and spread that perception to others in their circles.

So in this world where every word-of-mouth message has the potential to be amplified hundreds or even thousands of times over, what can you do to protect your brand’s good name?

Of course, when times are good and everyone’s happy, it’s not too hard to provide a positive experience. But what about when things go wrong? What do you do when you’ve got a disappointed, frustrated, irate or even irrational customer on your hands? That’s when your problem-solving savvy is really put to the test.

In situations like these, it’s critical to ensure that every employee at every level of your company is thoroughly trained in tactics for transforming a conflict or complaint into a positive experience.

Here are 10 phrases you must absolutely, positively never ever say to a customer when your brand’s reputation is on the line:

That's our policy...

You care about your policies, but you know who doesn’t? Your customers. All they care about is getting their problem fixed.

Using policy as the justification for why you can't achieve this goal will fall flat every time. Of course you can’t let your customer walk all over you and it is sometimes necessary to draw a line, but you have little to risk by finding ways to work within those policies to offer an innovative solution.

There's nothing I can do...

This statement will make any customer’s blood boil. When you say “There’s nothing I can do,” what they hear is “You and your business don’t matter to us.” You might as well throw in the towel and walk away.

There's always something that can be done, even if it requires a little creativity and compromise. Make sure to give your employees leeway to improvise when necessary. A minor concession costs nothing compared to the impact of an angry customer blasting you on Twitter.

What you need to do is...

When customers call, they’re looking to you to fix their problem, not to be told how to fix it themselves.

Of course, there are some situations where it’s appropriate and even necessary to walk a customer through the steps required to solve a problem. Just be sure to choose your words carefully. The difference between saying “What you need to do” and “Let’s try this” is conveying the sense that you’re on their side and that you’re committed to working together hand-in-hand until their issue has been resolved.

I'm new at this...

Again, nobody cares. You might as well tell a customer that they should hang up, call back and hope to have better luck in reaching someone more competent.

Rather than exposing your weakness, simply bring in someone with more expertise and experience to help navigate this sticky situation. Your customer will appreciate the hands-on team approach, and you’ll benefit from learning from a pro.

No...

Ouch! Never, ever drop the "no" bomb. If you don’t make a concerted effort to solve the problem at hand, you can kiss that customer – and every other existing or prospective customer who will listen to their tale of woe – goodbye.

I don't believe...

I'm not sure...

We don't...

Take your pick, but these are all thinly veiled ways of saying “no,” which we’ve already established is the not the right answer. Save your breath and spend your time and energy looking for ways to be helpful and find viable alternatives.

There’s no one else here you can talk to...

Unless you are literally a one-man operation, customers know you're lying when they hear this statement. There's always someone higher up that can step in.

Telling someone there's nobody else they can talk to is tantamount to saying, "You’re not worth our time." This isn’t going to diffuse their anger and will likely send them packing, irate enough to leave horrible reviews all over the Web.

I don't know how to help you with that...

This phrase is problematic even when the best of intentions are meant by the employee offering support.

Sometimes a customer will ask tough questions. Instead of saying you don't know what to do, take a proactive role in connecting them with the correct resource within the company who can handle their problem.

That's not my job...

Wrong. No matter who you are or what your job title is, keeping your customers happy is your number one responsibility. Just do it.

I hate my job...

This company sucks...

These types of statements tend to surface when both the customer and the employee are in a state of emotional upset. It’s the equivalent of telling a customer that they're not going to find any help here.

Bad-mouthing the company is never the right answer, no matter what the situation. It can do immeasurable damage, and in reality, even the angriest customer doesn’t really want commiseration.

They don't care about your opinion. They’ve taken the time to give you a chance to make it right, and they want a solution.

If you find yourself reaching a breaking point where you feel the need to make statements like this, take a step back and clear your head. You may not feel that you’re getting the support you need from your company, but customers don't need to hear this. If necessary, ask if you can put them on hold momentarily while you "search for the solution." Then take some deep breaths, get help and do whatever you need to do to rejoin the conversation with a positive attitude.

{Nothing...}

Silence is the absolute worst thing a customer can hear from you.

If it’s necessary to put a caller on hold, don't keep them waiting long. Even better, get their information and tell them you’ll call them back (and then make sure you do – promptly!).

If they’re asking tough questions or getting frustrated, responding with silence will only add fuel to their fire. But that doesn’t mean you must have the right answer on the tip of your tongue, either.

Starting with genuine empathy is a great way to diffuse the situation. Even a simple, "Yes, sir, I can see why you are upset. Let me see what I can do to help you out," will buy you some time to organize your thoughts and collect your composure so that you can confidently work toward a mutually agreeable solution.

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Goodbye, Marketing. Hello, Trustcasting.

You hate marketing. So do we. The truth is that marketing has earned its bad reputation with every unfulfilled promise, every misleading claim and every disingenuous tagline it broadcasts to the world. Marketing’s presence is inescapable. Its attitude is one of disrespect, demanding our time and participation on its own terms. Its conversations are one-way and its relationships are self-serving. Its terminology is that of deception — slick, glossy, flash, spin. Its influence on our culture is subversive, promoting the shallow and the artificial. Its methods are rooted in laziness, always chasing the most gain through the least amount of effort. In a world ruled by marketing, loyalty is a commodity to be bought, not earned. The race comes down to who can spend the most, talk the loudest and be heard above the din of the competition. The day has come when marketing is no longer an immovable force standing between companies and their customers.Fortunately, the day has come when marketing is no longer an immovable force standing between companies and their customers. The methods of communication have been revolutionized, creating unlimited channels for conversations not only between one person and another but between people and business. Almost simultaneously, economic uncertainty has created a generation of discerning consumers that are no longer willing to passively absorb the web of lies concocted by marketing’s spin doctors. Together, these two major shifts have rendered the old systems of mass marketing ineffectual. It’s time to eradicate this insidious affliction from our culture. In the Trust Manifesto, we established that “In a marketplace founded by, built by and existing for the people, trust is the only fundamental currency.” If the new currency of business is trust, the new way to grow business is trustcasting. What is trustcasting? Simply put, it is the ongoing process of building and maintaining trust between a business and its customers. Following the first and most important principle outlined in the Trust Manifesto, trustcasting holds as its mantra that any and all resources dedicated to the promotion of business must directly or indirectly be founded in trust. Trustcasting approaches customers as people, not numbers. For those ingrained in the old practices of mass marketing, this represents a daunting ideological shift. The task of earning and keeping trust cannot be reduced to statistics or demographic segments. If the new currency of business is trust, the new way to grow business is trustcasting.As the world of business returns to operating at the human level, the crutches of marketing are stripped away. You can no longer gloss over serious issues with pretty ads; you can’t mask mediocrity with perfectly scripted commercials. In trustcasting, everything is centered around developing an authentic and reciprocal relationship between company and customer, a process for which no shortcuts exist. Trustcasting requires that you get to know your customers on a personal level and engage them in two-way conversation. Communication must be conducted in human terms and show human qualities — sincerity, candor, even humility. The quality of the interaction should demonstrate that you not only value their time and attention but have their best interests at heart. In all things, respect for the customer is paramount. Trustcasting recognizes that word-of-mouth is no longer a by-product of marketing but the primary medium by which today's customers are won. Therefore, rather than pouring untold sums into advertising, the real investment is made in the quality of the product or service. Listen to your customers and reevaluate what you have to offer. Strive to deliver a message they want to believe in, a product they want to own and a culture they not only want to be a part of but are driven to convince others to join as well. While the methods of communication employed by trustcasting agents may be revolutionary, the practices and principles of trustcasting are not. They are rooted in and based upon a timeless, proven approach to business development — the way business was done before marketing intervened in the relationship between companies and customers. When it comes to earning and keeping trust, there is no substitute for hard work, honest communication and real value. The time to begin trustcasting is now. Seek out an agency that is engaged in bona fide trustcasting practices, and launch yourself ahead of your competitors who are stuck in the old ways of marketing. At first glance, the new rules for doing business might seem formidable. In truth, trustcasting demands much more from companies than marketing. However, the payoff for the additional investment in time and resources required is getting and keeping the best kind of customers — true, dedicated fans that identify themselves with and become evangelists for your brand.

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